Feeling better today.

Don't mind yesterday's blog. It was a fluke. A hiccup in the master plan.

I'm making my own training plan. I'm compiling it from Tara's, from what I've been doing with Kevan and some other ones I found online. It will all be ok.

Goals! I have some:

9/13 FIRM 1/2 Iron Bike Relay - to do well, to go as fast as I can, to keep a pace and to have fun. Also enjoy the experience of participating in a half ironman (albeit in a relay).

9/20 Buzzard's Bay Sprint Triathlon - To place (ultimate goal win my age group). Finishing? Got that. Finishing well? Working on it. It's a longer course.

10/25: Duathlon in Wrentham.

Next year: Olympic Distance for sure, 1/2 Iron is a possibility if I can get my swimming and running together. If I get really serious about training. If I can invest time, quality training and heartfelt energy into this thing.

Olympic distance is where I want to be. That's where I want to train to compete. The half Ironman is to see if I can do it. The 13 mile run is scary (although I am a better distance runner). The 1.3 mile swim is even scarier. That's like 32 laps in the pool, right?

There is no doubt in me I want to be a triathlete. Completing one just cemented it for me. I want to committ to this. To live this lifestyle, to try and be competent at three sports at one time, that's what I want to do. I just need to work through the training discomfort and learn to push myself, really push. Coasting through training workouts is not what I need.

Swim today went well, 800 meters in the fast lane (actually swimming fast since I had to share the lane), very little struggle (almost relaxed). My stroke needs practice, but I think it's just due to being out of the pool. Trevor forgot my name. Do I look like a Jessica?

Maybe yoga tonight. Maybe that's what I need. Maybe I feel out of routine? I need to see my yoga friends and dazzle them with my triathlon results. ;)

Tenative Training Week:

Tuesday: Yoga. And extra credit ab work. Squishy in the middle. Ok, not really, but I feel I'm squishy in the middle. I actually have a six pack underneath that scar, if you can believe it. I wish I could see it.

Wednesday: I normally do a brick, but Ben has his surgery and I don't know what time until Hasbro calls, so that may be out. I will try really early, maybe at sunrise. But if there's no one to watch him... So maybe I'll run after Saturday's epic bike ride.

Thursday: Maybe a group ride? If not, I'll head out on the bike on my own.

Friday: Track practice with Kevan.

Saturday: Doing the FIRM 1/2 Iron Bike course, me and 56 miles. I'm pretty excited about that. I have to find a way to match my cycling workouts to that event while I still train for the sprint.

We'll see what I can work in between Ben and the hospital. Josh has said that anything I feel I need to do for training he'll take care of the kids, which is nice.

It should be a relatively quick, safe and harmless procedure. I'm worried because he's so small. Terrified of not so positive ramifications. So terrified I don't even think I should prepare myself for them.

I feel terrible that I can't explain it to him, and I have tried. But he doesn't really grasp it. It's kind of like Wednesday will be an ambush of sorts. We're just going to the doctor.

But, you know, if I put it out there that's he's going to be ok, it will be. That's very Law of Attraction, I think.

I made a really sweet pasta dish for dinner on Sunday. I'll post the recipe. Grilled Pasta Primavera. It's not vegan.

Vegan. I don't think that's for me. I can be part time vegan, really compassionate about animals, but full time vegan is hard. Nothing worthwhile is easy, but I have so much going on I don't need the additional food guilt. I have enough food/body issues. Who needs more? I'll commit to cruelty free dairy. I'll stop buying the agroindustrial products I really hate. I'll work on trying to buy more locally and lovingly produced dairy, but I can't give it up.

I'm rambling because I'm tired. I've already been up for almost three hours. I don't miss the early mornings that's for sure.

Taking Norah school clothes shopping today, pray for me. :) She has no interest in clothes or shopping. I could dress her in a burlap sack and she'd be alright.